Sunday, February 27, 2005

Another Weekend

It's been a rough weekend with one nice day sandwhiched in between.

Friday started off with me in an awful mood after a tiff with Eric when he bailed on his night of baby duty Thursday night. Things did get a bit better though and Eric brought home The Village to watch and we ordered a pizza. I went to bed and left him with the baby monitor. He came in at about 4:45 a.m. saying he couldn't get Grace to sleep and asked if she could sleep with me. I agreed and we slept until 8:45 a.m.!

Saturday after Grace and I got up and got a bottle, Eric went to the office and Grace and I headed to Babies' R Us to do a little scouting for the perfect shower gift for Samara and "Little Bean." Grace was an angel, smiling at me and anyone else and just hanging out as we walked around the store. We got home just in time for the 12:00 feeding. At around 1:00 p.m. I put her down in my bed for a nap. I fell asleep first, but she soon followed and we slept until about 3:30 p.m. After that we got up, got Grace another bottle and got ready for Mom & Dad's first night without the baby! I took her to my friend Kim's from work. Eric and I then went to the mall and got me a new pair of shoes for my birthday and took my Mother's ring to be sized to fit my middle finger. After the mall we went to a couple of sporting goods stores and purchased a weight bench, weights, and a treadmill. Finally, I'll really be able to exercise at home! No more excuses on the weight loss. After shopping we went to Outback. We had to wait 30 minutes longer than they told us we would, but eventually we got to eat. It was good, but we were really mad about the wait. After dinner we went and picked up Grace. She was very good for Kim which made us very happy.

This morning, Grace continued to be angelic during church. She was awake at first, but just sat quietly flashing us little smiles, then she started to fuss and I quickly gave her the pacifier. Then she just started sucking on it and drifted off to sleep until the service was over. We took another long nap this afternoon, but since then she's been a terror. I think she may just be gassy, but I went to the grocery store around 5:00 p.m. and Eric said she cried the whole time I was gone. She wouldn't take her bottle at 6, so we let her go to sleep and tried again at 7. This time she ate a bit, but still cried alot and after we gave her a bath she cried again for another 30 minutes or so. She's also had diarreah again. I'm not sure what's wrong with her, but if this is a glimpse of what a colicy baby would be, I'm glad we didn't have that! I hope we can get her to sleep tonight.

Ohhhhh...we need another diaper change. I better go now.

Monday, February 21, 2005

First Overnight Travel with Grace w/Pictures

This weekend was our first overnight trip with Grace. It actually went very, very well. It took me all evening Thursday to pack though and I had so much stuff for Grace, but we ended up using almost everything, so I'm glad I brought it all.

Friday Eric called me at work because he had a loan coming in late, so I had to go pick up Grace. When we got home, I cleaned out her diaper bag, changed clothes and fed her. Eric got home while we were still feeding and started loading up the car. When we finished feeding we changed Grace into a comfy sleeper and headed out. Eric realized he left the cash out on his desk at work, so we had to swing by there first, but we were officially on the road by 7:00 p.m. Grace fell asleep almost immediately in the car. We considered stopping around Indianapolis, to wake up Grace and feed her, but then decided to just keep driving until she woke up or we got there and we managed to drive all the way without stopping for a feeding. We got in around 10:45 p.m. Once we were there, Eric brought in the stuff and I fed Grace. Unfortunately, she had another vomiting incident and pretty much brought it all back up, but we tried. Luckily, she decided she was sleepy, so we put her to bed around midnight in her pack and play in Donna's room. Donna gave me the bed, she slept on the couch, and Eric slept in a recliner in the living room. I think the room was too cold, because Grace woke up at about 1:30 a.m. and I decided to put her in bed with me. We then got up at 6:00 for a bottle.

Once we finished the morning feeding, I thought I'd see if Grace would go back to bed with me, but she was just cooing and kicking me. Donna came in and got her and hung out with her until her next feeding at 8:30 a.m. Nana decided to feed Grace for me, so I showered and dressed (Eric too). Once we were done feeding Grace, we hit the road for my Grandparents house, an hour away. We ended up spending about 4 hours there just visiting. Two of my cousins came by with there kids too, so it was a very nice visit. Unfortunately, Grace had several very loose stools, so we went through 3 outfits! Good thing I packed a ton. Here's a picture of Grace with her Great-Grandparents. She's so lucky that she gets to know them.

Here's another picture from the visit. Notice the pacifier. Last week we bought a different kind of pacifier and amazingly, she can keep this one in her mouth all by herself. Apparently, Nuk's just don't work for us.

After visiting with the Great-Grandparents, we went back to Eric's Mom's and then out to dinner with Donna and her boyfriend Larry, and Eric's Uncle Lenny and Aunt Darlene. It was such a good time. Grace actually just sat in her carseat and slept the whole time. We also managed to keep Grace to her normal schedule, so after dinner we went back to the house and gave her a bath. After bathtime, Nana was playing with her and Grace was all smiles. (We get lots of these now!)

She also got to go to bed at her normal 10:00 bedtime and slept until 4:00 a.m. (then I brought her to bed with me until 6:00).

Sunday morning I again left Grace with Nana and went back to bed for a little while. After we were all ready and Grace had her 9:00 feeding we headed down to Kyle's for my niece Ashton's 7th birthday party. Grace and her Nana were all dressed up, so we got this picture.

The party was at Magic Planet so we there were kids everywhere and too much to do, so we didn't actually get to see much of the birthday girl. We did get to see Kyle & Leslie, along with Grandpa Gary and Grandma Christie, though, so overall it was a really good trip. We got to see pretty much everyone. After Grace's 3:00 bottle we headed home. I didn't want to complete disrupt the nighttime schedule by trying to drive straight through again, so we stopped around 6:00 p.m to get us some dinner and give Grace a bottle. All was going well, but after 4 ounces, Grace again threw up. This time all over Eric and the floor at Burger King. Poor baby. We cleaned up and I had a change of clothes in the diaper bag, so we cleaned up and left. I think she may get a little carsick after long rides, because those were the only bottles she had problems with.

Today, I've had the day off work, but I sent Grace to daycare anyway. Although she woke up at 2:30 and 4:30 and I couldn't delay the bottle past 5 a.m. this morning. I also couldn't get her back to sleep before daycare, so after Eric and Grace left I went back to bed until about 9:45 a.m. Then I got up and cleaned the house. This is the first whole house cleaning I've been able to do since she's been born. I cleaned every room, steamed spots on the carpet that needed it, did all of our laundry, all of Grace's laundry, made a spot for the new treadmill and workout stuff in the basement, and hung a picture and toy net in Grace's room. All that just in time to go pick up Grace from daycare. It's been a busy day, but my house is clean! Well, that's about it. I'm hoping this will be a slow week with not much going on.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

2 Month Doctor’s Appointment & Other Updates

Yesterday I had to take Grace to the doctor for her 2 month well-visit and shots. The doctor checked her out and agreed that she was well enough to get shots. I told her that I think she may be coming down with a cold. She’s been coughing a little over the past couple of days, although it’s a dry cough. She also has been having some stuff in her nose that looks more like nasal stuff than dried milk. Then lately she sounds a little wheezy. The doctor agreed that she might be coming down with something, but said they won’t do anything in advance. She said if she has trouble sleeping to use a humidifier and elevate her head (which we already do). I told her we did visit the Cleft Palate Clinic and she said they didn’t send her a letter. I did get one, so I said I’d try to remember to make her a copy for Grace’s file.

They weighed and measured her. She weighed 12 pounds 10 ounces and was 22 ½ inches long. She’s still above average in both height and weight. She was pretty fussy during the visit, but she fell asleep right about the time we got there, so she was missing her nap. She got 4 shots, 2 in each leg. She cried, but we didn’t see real tears. Afterwards, I put her in her carseat and she was asleep before we even made it to the car. I dropped her off at daycare at around 11:30 a.m. and she was still sleeping.

Later, I called the daycare at around 2:30 p.m. They said she was still sleeping! I was sort of annoyed because they didn’t wake her up for her bottle at noon. She went from 9:00 to 3:00 without eating. When she had her 6:00 bottle, she ate 7 ½ ounces! She usually only eats 4 or 5, so she must have been hungry. She was also sleepy in the evening, so it really wore her out.

On another note, Eric and I are feeling better, so it was a 24 hour bug. Also, we’ve really been doing well sleeping. Both Sunday night and last night, she went to bed at the normal time (between 10 and 10:30) and started waking up around 4:30 a.m. I went to get her at that time and brought her to bed with me with her pacifier and got her to stay in bed until 6:00, then we got up and got her a bottle. I’m trying to train her that 6:00 is get-up time, not 4:30 a.m. Today, she went back to sleep immediately, I think she just had some gas, since she farted as soon as I picked her up and went right back to sleep.

One more thing…This weekend will be our first weekend to travel with Grace. We’re heading back to Indiana for my niece’s birthday party. We’re driving to my Mother-In-Law’s on Friday night, and then up to my Grandparent’s so they can see Grace on Saturday morning, then back to my mother-in-laws. Sunday morning we’ll drive down to Kyle & Leslie’s and the party is at noon. We should be able to see them, plus Eric’s Dad and Girlfriend will be there. So we’ll get to see all of Eric’s side again, plus Great-Grandma & Grandpa. My Mom is planning on coming in the weekend of March 4th, so it’ll be nice to see her again too. Ok, this post is long enough. I better go.

Sunday, February 13, 2005

Poor Mommy & Daddy

I think we got Grace's bug. Eric and I are both trainwrecks today. We ache all over, have had "bathroom problems" and have both thrown up. All I can say is that I sure hope Grace didn't feel this bad with her bug, poor baby.

I feel bad for her today. We've both just been laying around, so she hasn't got a whole lot of interaction. We took a 2 1/2 hour nap together this afternoon, but I haven't really "played" with her. Mostly because everytime I moved I thought I was going to throw up.

I hope we're better tomorrow. Being sick is not fun.

Saturday, February 12, 2005

Poor Baby

We have had our first sickness with Grace. She seems better today, but I just keep thinking, "My poor baby."

Thursday when we got home from daycare, I gave Grace her 6:00 bottle. While burping her, she made this horrible loud burp noise and threw up. It wasn't spit up, as it looked like pretty much everything she just ate, plus she was heaving to get it out. It went all over my pants and the floor and her bib as I was trying to catch it. We changed my clothes and cleaned up and she finished her bottle. She seemed fine the rest of the evening, Eric even had her smiling when he got home.

Thursday night/Friday morning around 1:30 a.m. Grace started crying on the monitor. I waited a couple minutes to see if she'd go back to sleep, as it was pretty early for her to be hungry. She didn't stop, so I went to check on her. I picked her up and saw that her face was all wet, so I looked and she'd thrown up in her crib. It was all over the sheets and her. It had ran down her face, so it was in her ear and hair and all over her sleeper. I changed her clothes and she seemed to feel better and acted like she was going to go back to sleep. I was holding her and then she threw up again all over me. So I took her into my room and sat her in her bouncy seat while I changed clothes and when I picked her back up, she threw up again (although this one was very small as there wasn't much left). I just rocked her for a while and then put down some extra blankets on my bed and let her sleep with me. She really wanted her pacifier, so I held it in her mouth. Unfortunately, every time it fell out, she woke up, and everytime I fell asleep and let go, it fell out. Let's just say it was a long 4 hours until we got up at 6:00.

Friday morning when we got up, she felt a little warm to me, but I get really hot when I sleep, so I thought it might just be a transfer of my body heat. I gave her her bottle, which she kept down, but her cheeks looked really rosy. We took her temperature 99.4. We decided to go ahead and take her to daycare. We told them what happened and they said they would keep an eye on her temperature. At work I decided to call the doctor and see if they wanted to see her. They did, so we got an appointment at 3:50 p.m. Just after lunch the daycare called to tell me that while she didn't have a fever, Grace had thrown up after her 12:00 p.m. bottle and she had diarreah at 12:30 p.m. Her 9:00 bottle went down fine though and she'd taken some good naps in the morning.

I picked her up just after 3 and we went to the doctor. They think she has some sort of stomach bug. They said it was a good sign that she had diarreah too, as if it was coming out both ends there wasn't a blockage. She still is interested in eating, so that is good and she isn't exceptionally fussy. He told us to try to feed her smaller amounts more often and if she doesn't want to take the formula we can try pedialite. We're just supposed to watch and make sure she doesn't start throwing up more frequently, get a higher fever, or get alot more fussy. If she's better on Monday we'll still do shots, but if not we can use our appointment as a sick visit.

So we came home and she ate her 6:00 bottle fine. I gave her a bath and started her 9:00 bottle on time. After 2 ounces, she threw up again. It really upset her. She cried and I saw her first real tears. I almost cried with her. We changed her and just cuddled and around 10, she took another 2 ounces and kept it down. She went to bed around 11:00 p.m. and slept until 4:00 a.m. She ate 4 ounces then and then Eric brought her back to sleep with me. She slept much better and we got up around 8:00 a.m. She took another 4 ounces and is now napping. Her face looks better and she was smiling for us this morning, so I'm hoping the worst has passed.

My poor baby. I just felt so bad for her. I keep cuddling with her and she seems to want that. This makes me feel like a Mom. Oh, yeah they weighed her at the doctor and she now weighs 12 pounds 6 ounces.

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

CD 1

This afternoon my body decided that it is once again ready to get pregnant. Not that my mind agrees by any means, but apparently I'm fully recuperated. Don't worry, you won't have to hear about my monthly cycle on a regular basis, since I'm not working on the TTC thing anymore, but this month I have a small delima.

I saw the doctor two weeks ago and was given a perscription for birth control pills. I decided to utilize our mail order perscription service, so I sent my perscription in last Monday. My pills have not arrived yet, but I was supposed to start them when my period started. I guess I'll wait and see when they arrive. If they get here tomorrow, I may go ahead and start them this month, if not, I may decide to wait another month to be sure I'm using them correctly. Maybe I'll call the doctor to see what they think. Also, anyone remember how long it takes for them to take effect? I don't want to mess that one up!

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Back in the Saddle

It's been a good week. Monday was my first day back at work and it was great. To start, I had an answer to prayer and Grace slept until 5:30 a.m. on Monday morning, so I had a pretty good night's sleep. Everyone was glad to see me and of course had to check out all the pictures. Although by the end of the day, I still had 120 e-mails that hadn't been read, I felt refreshed. I realized that in some ways I missed work. I missed interacting with these people and the actual job itself. My co-workers that covered my accounts while I was out were eager to hand them back over and get me up to speed on what I missed. There were also questions asked of me and I still knew the answers! While it will take me a week or two to get completely up to current on everything, I think I'll do fine. The challenge has actually been to make myself quit at 5:00 and go home. I've got important things waiting there.

Grace has been doing good in day care too (both days). It hasn't been that hard on me because I haven't had to take her. Eric leaves with her in the mornings and he drops her off. However, by me not going, I don't get the full update from the center about how her day went. After my endless questions yesterday, Eric did much better today at getting more information and when they got home he told me everything they said. The first day they said she was a little fussy until they figured out what her cries meant (can you believe they figured out in a day!) Today they said it was much better and she was a delight. Apparently she was a hit with the other kids too. Yesterday, a little boy (about 2) was laying beside her bouncy seat stroking her cheek while she was sleeping when Eric picked her up. Today a little girl said goodbye to her when they left. I'm super happy so far and think it's a good place for her.

Grace has been going through amazing amounts of change the past week too. She's really looking at things now. I know she knows who I am. I've caught her seeking me out when other people are holding her (even her Dad). She makes lots of movements with her hands and legs. She can activate some of her toys on the bouncy seat and playmat by batting or kicking them. She's been trying to figure out thumb sucking. She hasn't figured out the thumb part, but she keeps putting her fist up to her mouth. We're starting to get more frequent smiles too. Still not all the time, but every day we get a glimpse or two. Today she smiled at me in the morning while we were lounging on the bed waiting for Daddy to finish getting ready. It made my day. We also got several when we got home from daycare and even got one on camera.



She's started making more "talking" type noises too, so we just keep talking back to her. Her hair is getting thinner. She has a couple of spots on the back and side of her head that are almost bald. Her new hair is lighter in color than her newborn hair. I think she may turn out with more my color hair than Eric's. I don't think she'll go completely bald, though. The hair she does have is getting longer too, so that's neat. I hope her new hair will have some curl. It curls when it's wet, but dries straight, so we'll see. She's getting so big! I can't wait to see how much she weighs next week at the doctor. I'm sort of sad that she's not itty bitty anymore, but she's so much more fun now and I love watching her develop. I think things are going to start getting really fun soon. Ok, time to go, but here are a couple more pictures.


I love bath pictures.


This one was after a long nap on the couch with me. How's that for a bad hair day?

Friday, February 04, 2005

A Mother's Love

This post may seem a bit bizarre, but bear with me.

For some reason today I started thinking about SIDS, and how horrible it would be to lose a little baby. So then I thought back to my first baby and how I felt when I lost it. I thought people were crazy when made comments about how I was "lucky" that I'd lost the baby so early. How could they say it was easier to lose a baby early? Didn't they understand that I'd loved that baby from the moment I found out I was pregnant? Just because I never got to feel it inside me, hold it, or name it didn't make it less real.

Then as my pregnancy with Grace progressed and I started to feel her move and watch my belly keep growing, I started to understand a little more. Yes, it would have been much harder on me to lose the baby farther along in pregnancy. I loved her more every day. We had already started bonding. I felt her with me all the time, I named her, I talked to her. I know people who lost babies late in pregnancy and my heart went out to them. Yes, my miscarriage was hard, but I couldn't imagine the pain of a later pregnancy loss.

Then Grace was born. Even now as she's still an infant, I can't imagine my life without her. It seems like my love for her just keeps growing exponentially. I love every sound she makes, even her cries. I love how my touch can settle her and how sometimes the only thing she wants is to be in her Mommy's arms. Can I possibly love this child even more than I do now?

Then I look ahead. What happens when she becomes a toddler or a school age child? I have to believe my love for her will keep growing. Imagine when she runs to me for hugs or she learns to say "I love you" back. I definately can see my love being even stronger then.

What about when she becomes a teenager? Everyone knows how difficult they can be. Will I love her more then? I kind of think so. I'll start to see the woman she's going to become and my heart will swill with love and pride.

At some point this love thing has to level off right? If not, how could parents ever let their children go? So it must be when she leaves home, right? That's when I'll love her as much as possible. But wait, I remember the letters my parents wrote to me the night they dropped me off at my dorm room, my freshman year of college. Even my Dad wrote me a letter about how much he missed me already. Could it be at that moment they were still loving me even more than the day before? Part of loving your children is allowing them to take the next step and grow up?

What about when she gets married? Has her own babies? Is it really possible that my heart has room to grow that much? A mother's love must be an exponential kind of love. It never stops or levels off. So as much and completely as I loved her from the moment I knew she existed inside me, it was only the beginning. Every day that love continues to grow and expand. I'm always going to be tied to her, and though she won't remember those first nine months when we were inseparable, I will. She will always be a part of me. And one day as she stares into the eyes of her first baby, she'll finally understand, just how much I love her.

Thursday, February 03, 2005

The Last Week

I haven't updated much this week. Probably because I've been trying to update my Diet blog daily. Not too much is going on. I've been doing very good on my diet this week which is encouraging. It's kind of tough since I spent the last 10 months eating whatever my heart desired.

Eric and I have been "practising" this week for when I go back to work. It started with practising wake up times (which worked for me for 2 days). Now I've been going back to sleep with her in the mornings. We'll do it for real next week and I know from the 2 days we did do it, that I can get her fed, dressed, and me showered, dressed and ready for work on time. Eric and I are going to take turns on the night shift. He's had two this week. The first night she slept from 11:00 until 5:20 a.m. He actually asked me if I wanted to go ahead and take her, but I said no, and he did get up and get her. I took over at 6:00 a.m. and let him get ready for work. Last night was his second night and she got up at about 4:15 (I didn't get her to bed until 11:45). I think that was tougher for him. He never came back to bed and I got up at 6:30 and he was laying on the couch with her. Apparently he didn't even try to put her back to bed. I've still been napping this week, so we'll see how I do next week without the naps. I'll survive, I'm sure.

Tuesday I met with Grace's daycare again. I'm still really happy with them. They were all ready for her. She slept the whole time we were there and I think they were disappointed not to see her awake. They showed me her cubby (where to put her stuff) and her crib already had her name on it. We discussed drop off procedures, where to put her bottles, and they told me I can call as often as I want. They said even if it's 6 times a day, feel comfortable calling to see how she is. We went over her special bottles and what her current routine is like. I'm sure she'll be in good hands.

Well, she's acting like she's ready for her next bottle, so that's all for now.

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Pictures

Someone pointed out to me that they couldn't see all the pictures of Grace I added. Apparently, I forgot to make the album public. I've corrected it, so they should be visible now. Leave me a comment if you have trouble accessing.