Getting Things In Order

I'm feeling the need to post alot today, but this one's be rattling around in my head for a while, so I needed to get it down.

It seems like for a while now, I've been just going through the motions. To be honest, I think it was a matter of survival. The whole parenthood thing is overwhelming and scary and all consuming, but there are parts of my life I would like to get control over again. This is going to be a sort of mid-year New Year's Resolution. Here's what I want to focus on and my goals.

Spirtuality
There have been times in my life where I've felt very close to God and times where I've felt not so close. Right now I'm kind of somewhere in the middle. I don't feel far from Him, but I know I could be closer. I actually have a desire to do something to strengthen that bond. For about a year now, Eric has been going to a weekly Bible study and he's had some amazing growth. Since I grew up in church and he didn't, I guess I've always sort of thought of myself as spirtually more mature than him, but that isn't the case anymore. It isn't a contest, but I would like to be able to have discussions with him that aren't from my memory of lessons learned years ago, but of things I'm studying now. I want us to be comfortable discussing God and church at home, so Grace will know that Mom and Dad actually believe what they talk about at church. I don't really feel up to a formal study, but I have a book of a 12 week study that I did in college. At the time it was trying to tell me things I didn't want to hear, but I think I'm ready now. I plan on starting on Sunday.

Health
I know I've discussed it before and constantly on my diet blog, but I'm ready to get healthy. Spending time with my Mom a week ago was a real inspiration to me. She's dieted pretty much since I can remember, but the weekend she visited she stuck to it all weekend! That's a difficult task for anyone, but she was excited about it and doing great. I want to do that too. I've done it before so I know it's possible. Read my post here for more details, but my goal is to lose the rest of my baby weight (7 1/2 pounds) in the next 2 months. I'd like to lose about 15 total before I get pregnant again.

I would also like to get in a routine of staying fit and eating right. I didn't do a good job during my pregnancy with Grace, but I'd like to try to be a good habit and really eat well and exercise next time I'm pregnant. Sort of like a practice run. I know I've discussed it with my close friends and family, but I don't think I've mentioned it here. After I have my second child, I would like to be a gestational surrogate. I have done a little research and will have much more to do before the time comes, but I really feel called to help someone else have a child. I loved being pregnant and have no doubts that I could carry a child and hand it over to the parents if I knew it had no genetic ties to me or Eric. I have fears that my one previous miscarriage might be a strike against me, but when the time comes I'll fill out the applications and hopefully someone will feel that I'm the right woman to help her. But, if I do get to follow through, I would like to be in the habit of eating right, exercising, and doing the right things. I can bend the rules with my body and my baby, but would feel guilty being less healthy with someone else's child.

Finances
Having a baby is a drain on the checkbook. Part of our problem is that we keep spending like before, but now have additional expenses. Eric and I have discussed a 5 year plan for our finances. In 5 years we would like to have the following done:
- Pay off credit card (trust me, that's an optimistic goal)
- Have only 1 car payment (pay off my car and keep it and trade his in for an SUV after baby #2)
- Be financially ready (or already have) moved to a larger home in a better school system.

I'm going to revise our budget and starting in August we are going to really try to stick to it. It will require some sacrifices (planned dinners out instead of whenever we feel like it, bringing lunch instead of eating out (could play into that health goal), less frivolous shopping for Grace). Some of the revisions might seem surprising too, for example, increasing our budgeting giving to the church. However, overall if we keep our goals in mind, I think we can do it and it'll be worth it in the end.

Professional Growth
I've been doing pretty good here, but in the short term I need to study for my next CPCU exam. I think I'm scheduled to take it in late September and for once, I would love to be fully prepared before the night before the test. I've got to start studying earlier.

I also have recently been named the Professional Standards Officer for the office. It technically isn't a promotion, just another responsibility. However, I'm pretty sure if I do a good job it will definately be considered when promotions are awarded. I'm in a less busy time at work right now, so I've got some time to really work on it. I've just got to get started before I get super busy again.

So those are my mid-term goals. I'm on vacation next week and in the early part of the week I'm going to try to figure out how to arrange my schedule to fit in planning my meals and diet, weekly monitoring of the budget, daily Bible study, studying for my exam, plus still have time for Grace and Eric. That will be the challenge, but I believe all of these things are good, so I'll be able to work it out.