Still Here

Where does the time go? Oh yes, I spend it feeding Grace, pumping, and napping when I can.

This has been a rough two weeks for me, but I think I'm finally starting to get the hang of things and hopefully, it'll turn around soon. I think I should first admit that I think I have a bit of the "baby blues." I wouldn't go as far as saying I have postpartum depression, but I will say there has only been 1 day I haven't cried since Grace has been born. I think a big part of it is the lack of sleep. I've always been a 8 hours plus kind of girl and sleeping in 2 or 3 hour chunks has been really rough. Especially when it takes Grace about 40 minutes to an hour to drink her bottle, then I have to pump and then maybe, she'll go to sleep. She's been staying awake after feedings alot now, so there is usually a 2 or 2 1/2 hour stretch where we're up overnight. I try not to make Eric do much in those overnight times, because he's back to work, but man it's tough.

I do love her though, and she's so sweet. She makes the cutest faces and I just love cuddling up with her. I even let her sleep in my bed with me one night (mostly because she had been up from 7:00 p.m. to 1:30 a.m. and woke up every time I tried to lay her in her crib and I was dying for some sleep, but oh well.

Baby's crying. I'll be back later.

Ok, new day and another moment to try to finish this post while Eric is taking the baby duty.

It's now Monday of our second week by ourselves and I think we're starting to get the hang of things although last night was a rough one. We also had a doctor's appointment at 10:00 today. I'm not sure if it happens every time, but we didn't get to see the doctor until about 11:15 a.m. and that is way too long to wait with a fussy baby. Luckily I brought a couple of bottles and fed her while we were waiting. This girl eats almost constantly, but she's gaining weight as today she weighed 9 pounds 1 ounce. After the doctor we came home and took a nap (both of us), then we got up, fed Grace and went to the grocery store. That's 2 outings in 1 day, I'm getting to be a pro at this! Sunday was another busy day as we took Grace to church for the first time and then went to brunch afterwards with Eric's family (Mom, Brother, Sister-in-Law, and Nieces). Grace slept through the entire service and woke up for a bottle while we were waiting on our table. She finished eating just before our food came and hung out quietly in her carrier while we ate. I was so impressed.

I think physically I'm recovering nicely too. I got over most of the soreness after the first week although, I'm not sure how long the stitches take to dissolve or if they are still there. I'm still bleeding a bit, but it's getting lighter, so I'm assuming that will be done soon. Of my 35 pound weight gain, I lost between 15 and 20 pounds by the time I got home from the hospital. The rest has been slowly coming off. I've been frustrated that I still have to wear maternity clothes as my prepregnancy stuff either doesn't fit or makes me look really fat. Although Eric keeps reminding me that it's only been two weeks. Today, however, I weighed myself and found I'm only 9.5 pounds above my prepregancy weight, so I tried my jeans on again and with some holding my breath, I got them buttoned and wore non-maternity jeans to the doctor today. I haven't been craving as much junk, so I'm hoping the rest will continue to drop off. Eric bought me some exercise videos and stuff I can do at home for Christmas (at my request), so I'm hoping to start exercising soon, although I need to wait at least a month before I can maybe get clearance from my doctor. I was considering starting a diet for the New Year's but may need to put that on hold for a while too.

Pumping all the time really has me down, as it seems like I spend all of my time either feeding Grace or pumping. Assume it takes Grace 40 minutes to an hour to finish a bottle and she eats an average of 8 times per day. That's 6 to 8 hours a day feeding the baby. Then it takes me about 20 minutes start to finish to pump. I do that about 6 to 8 times per day which is about 3 hours pumping. That means if I do all feedings that I would be feeding or pumping 9 to 11 hours per day. Keep in mind that after several feedings she's awake for another hour or two, plus the time I'm trying to sneak naps in...that's why we're not posting much. Anyway, I wanted to discuss stopping pumping and switching to formula with the doctor today. She was thrilled at me pumping though. Especially when I told her I'm getting between 3 and 4 ounces per breast at each pumping and Grace is eating about 3 to 4 ounces per feeding. That means I have been freezing a ton of milk and have a great supply. She wants me to keep it up for at least a month, so I've got another two weeks to keep going. After that, we'll re-evaluate.

Ok, I think I've left the family upstairs long enough, plus I haven't put up those groceries from todays trip to the store and I was considering starting some laundry. I better get to work. I'll try to update again soon, but if not, I'm still around, just busy.